Robyn, the Perfect Older Sister to Them All

Do you notice a theme? Robyn!

Robyn, the leader, the true blue leader, is the one who started the clan. I have always been grateful she was the first. She is the nurturer, the "other" mother! She loves these siblings like no other. If tomorrow I would be no more, she would rush in to fill the loss. She wonders how she can have children, how could she love her own more than her siblings. You and I both know she will have no problem with this but you and I both know that this is how we felt gazing into the eyes of our baby while pregnant with another! We understand what she is feeling.

I am thankful that Chris came second. He was the little guy who would waddle first into social scenes with Robyn following him. Kathryn came relentlessly pestering them. Geoff rekindled our love for babies even with the "High Alert" stage we found ourselves in with him! Nicky defined perfection, or so we thought (she's helped bring some realism to that view). Jesse, his name means wealth, is flat out wonderful.

I love spending time with these children during the holidays, many memories to dwell on and many memories still to make. Robyn led the way and even to this day her involvement in their lives is wonderful. She even gave us a wonderful new son. Who at age sixteen knows who she is going to and WILL marry? Robyn,she is the bomb!

Uprooted, Not Looking So Good!

It is raining and therefore there was no walking. So, I am sluggish, though I did hop on the exercise bike we have crammed into our room. I only rode for fifteen minutes, big whoop!

The computer has received my morning attention, much to do, so many emails to respond to, important stuff, you know.

I am watching the clock, I need to be ready to go on a field trip at 11:30 pm. I know, impressive... I am thinking today I am trying to sabotage myself, you know, push it to the very limits. It feels kinda like a risk, how much time can I waste until I need to put the rush on and scramble around. Why do I do this? I kinda get a kick out of it, that impish self always teasing the sane self.

This week is packed. In fact, oh no!, I just remembered, I was going to go pick up some coffee bags...........yikes!
Why did I think this morning was to be a gently flowing river?
Probably 'cause I was pulled into the "other" world of the computer.

Shoot!

The tree in the picture was from a storm this summer that ran through this town like no other storm I had ever seen! This tree did major damage to a home nearby!

Headlines in light of Godlines

Do you read the headlines in light of God's word?
The following quotes were taken from news sources on Sunday, November 28, 2010 with quotes from ancient writings following them.

THE NEWS
“U.S. authorities on Thursday found a sophisticated tunnel used to smuggle drugs between Mexico and San Diego, the second such discovery in the region in less than a month.”


"The mighty man will become tinder
   and his work a spark;
both will burn together,
   with no one to quench the fire.” Is.1:31

“North Korea has deployed SA-2 surface-to-air missiles to its west coast near the Yellow Sea border with South Korea as U.S.-led naval drills got underway in a show of force against the North's deadly artillery attack on a South Korean island earlier last week, government sources said Sunday.”

"The LORD Almighty is the one you are to regard as holy,
   he is the one you are to fear,
   he is the one you are to dread." Is. 8:13

“The US and South Korea launched large-scale naval maneuvers Sunday (November 28) off the Korean Peninsula's west coast, days after North Korea bombarded an inhabited southern island.”

"In the last days
the mountain of the LORD’s temple will be established
   as the highest of the mountains;
it will be exalted above the hills,
   and all nations will stream to it." Is. 2:2

“South Korea and the United States kicked off joint naval drills in the Yellow Sea on Sunday in an overt show of force against North Korea, which has readied its multiple launch rocket systems and apparently held an artillery firing exercise.”

"The LORD Almighty has a day in store
   for all the proud and lofty,
for all that is exalted
   (and they will be humbled)," Is. 2:12

“Beijing on Friday lodged its first official protest of a joint U.S.-South Korean military exercise planned for Sunday, even as the aircraft carrier USS George Washington steamed toward the region.”

 “Holy, holy, holy is the LORD Almighty;
   the whole earth is full of his glory.” Is.6:3

“The Japanese coast guard has spotted two Chinese vessels attempting on Sunday to enter waters near islands in the East China Sea that are disputed by the two countries, Kyodo News reported.”

"Then the LORD will create over all of Mount Zion and over those who assemble there a cloud of smoke by day and a glow of flaming fire by night; over everything the glory[c] will be a canopy. It will be a shelter and shade from the heat of the day, and a refuge and hiding place from the storm and rain." Is.4:5,6

“The escalating debt crisis on the eurozone periphery is starting to contaminate the creditworthiness of Germany and the core states of monetary union.”

"Stop trusting in mere humans,
   who have but a breath in their nostrils.
   Why hold them in esteem?" Is.2:22

“Despite overnight snow storms and freezing temperatures, huge crowds have gathered in O'Connell Street to demonstrate against the cuts aimed at driving down Ireland's colossal national debt.”

  "Tell the righteous it will be well with them, for they will enjoy the fruit of their deeds." Is.3:10

Thanksgiving Week....

The garage is a mess. The basement is a mess. The kitchen walls should be painted. The radiators look steelish, gray and ugly. The floorboards need fixing. The windows are in dire need of patching, let alone replacing. All the walls are screaming for a fresh coat of paint. Lynn and I are overwhelmed as if an army has come and invaded our home and we have no artillery to fight them. We look at each other defeated.

In a few short days we will be sitting around a table eating a meal I have yet to plan and we will attempt to talk about gratitude.

A family in Rhode Island will be doing the same with their young son home from Afghanistan seeing life differently as he suffers from a Traumatic Brain Injury. His buddy in the Humvee is dead from the explosive while this young man's skull was blown out from the impact of the explosion.

A family in the Midwest will be sitting around the table with the knowledge that their little three year old girl has cancer. This was discovered when the doctors were fetching the penny she swallowed.

A family in New York will be sitting around a table missing their mother who died of cancer.

Perspective.

Creativity.........Stupidity? You Choose!

Kathryn, Christopher and Lynn just produced this commercial for a Pepsi/Dorito Challenge. If they would be one of the three chosen, their commercial would be aired at the SuperBowl! I had no idea of all the rigging they were up to for this stint.

Lynn was on the hood of the car with Kathryn driving. If I had ever wondered about the sanity of my dear husband it would most definitely be now. I thought sitting in the passenger seat was bad enough with "kinda" new drivers!

We will keep you posted if they make it anywhere. Until then you check it out:
http://www.CrashTheSuperbowl.com/#/gallery?video=6600

Lament.............

Neighbor's Caring and Sharing use to be where you would find me every Tuesday morning at Conestoga Mennonite Church. This church has carried out this ministry to women of all ages for ages. Today there was no exception to their schedule; fellowship and snacks, welcome, worship, prayer requests, prayer, speaker. This was my balm years ago and today was no different. I am not into flassy, uptodate stateoftheart sort of stuff. I am simple.

Janelle Shantz Hertzler, author and speaker-born out of intense pain and loss, shared the story of her way through grief, not out of grief, through grief. I had no time to wail but wail I could have.

She spoke of the stories we accumulate and do not share. She told us, sharing stories is a way to get out of our bodies sadness so we can heal. We create ruts in our brains by what we say and we can always create new ruts if the old ones keep us in a bad place she relayed to us.

The Psalms of Lament are bare, honest, cries with no holding back. I discover my lack of knowledge about the differences and categories the psalms present. She invited us to consider creating safe places in all the churches we represented for lamenting. Interesting to consider.

I hugged Janelle's mother in law. I noted that she was not mentioned. The loss for her is profound. This is the baby she carried for nine months, this is the baby she cared for till he walked, this is the young boy she loved dearly, this is the young man she cherished. This is the man she prayed for as God took him to other lands. This was the missionary son who whose name was mentioned on the other side of the lifeless phone from the other side of the world telling her that her son was killed. Her worse fear realized.

You, as a mother, lose your dear son to his wife. (I know you gain a daughter in law, but you know what I mean) When he dies, you lose him again and yet many do not notice your intense loss. She did not hold back her tears during the words that spoke of her dear son, she did not hold back her tears.

Tonight's reading for her might be one of the Psalms of Lament.

As you can see Janelle's website is shown in the picture. It is worth your time.

Schedule Adujusters=Christians

Today is a new day. This week is another week. What are we planning on accomplishing? What are our goals for the week? What is on your calendar?

Are we going to let the Spirit lead? Are we going to be willing to flex? Are we willing to add something that takes time and is not on our calendar? Are we willing to be schedule adjusters?

Let's go for it! God, if you want us to do some readjusting than you are going to have to readjust everything and you know what we are talking about! ATTITUDE!

Don't sit like a bump on a bench with a frown to beat the band.

Happy Birthday, Jesse

Today, Jesse Nathaniel Lynn Burkholder turns seven years old. This morning he bounded down the stairs, hair in a curly mess, snuggy pajamas (organized his clothing so we could actually find them to wear) and beautiful blues eyes dancing with excitement. Today is his to celebrate and he knows it full well!

I will never forget the surprise, the wonder, the sense of fun, the sneaking suspicion of joy, when I realized, "Hey, I think I am pregnant!"

Lynn, not so much.

It was with my fifteen year old, Robyn, that I viewed the results of the pregnancy test. She requested this shortly after Nicole's birth was announced. She felt left out. She wanted to be present for the results of a future pregnancy test. You can always answer yes when you know the likelihood is highly unlikely!

I was forty-one with a two year old still to care for, a vibrant-high alert, six year old, and teenagers lurking in the house and I felt privileged to still be capable of housing life.

The day Jesse was born was a beautiful crisp November day.
Happy Birthday, Jesse! You have come a long way from the Elmer Fudd look!

Lynn does not know what he would do without his Jesse.
See, women know best!

Robyn Elizabeth Lynne, How Would You Have Done Home Schooling Her?

Robyn Elizabeth Lynne, this is the gal I started out home schooling. Not quite sure what I was thinking but clear thinking has not guided me as often as I would like and it certainly did not with home schooling Robyn. I have said it often, when she arrived in this world she held me up against the wall by my collar and demanded from me answers, clear ones. I have yet to be able to fill that request!

This is the bare honest truth, she is way more smarter, loaded with tons more wisdom, organizational skills from who knows where, and thinks in a logical way that makes me want to slink over to the corner to slump. When she was three I was frustrated by her procrastination in the form of questions.
"Robyn, you are the queen of questions!" I told my little three year old.
"and I wish you were the queen of answers!" she replied in an itty bitty three year old voice.

What do you do? You choke on your spit is what you do! The signs were clear from the get go that this young thing knew what she wanted and had to simply wait until she could retrieve it for herself, no one else was delivering the way she knew they should. If ever I had anticipated a speaking career leading others in the uncharted paths of parenting, she made me put that dream to death!

"Were you home schooled? Did your mom talk about homeschooling? Did your mom want to home school you?"
My answers were pitiful, no.
"Then why do you want to home school me?" Off to kindergarten she went, she made her point, it was sound and frankly she scared me and these questions were asked at age four.

Thankfully, Carol Hoke rescued me. She had a one room school house teaching grades first through fifth. It met four days a week from 8-12:00 p.m.. Robyn received a stellar elementary education. At her graduation I do not remember my name in the line up of thank you's. In fact the only name I heard Robyn exclaim the night of her high school graduation was, Carol Hoke! Was I hurt? No, just real thankful that Carol was around to be subcontracted for the job! Carol and Robyn are sequential, logical and little bitty women who know how to command anyone they want to, you just do not mess with these women!

Sixth grade is when I had Robyn all to myself. She would sit on the couch with hands folded, face looking like I had nothing I could possibly give her by way of education, and an attitude that could be felt miles away. The other children would just wait for my pathetic lectures to her to be over. It was not fun. She would get me to a point where I would lose it and the yelling between the two of us was not good. We knew how to make a room go tense.

We realized at a certain point that our conversation was the same one over and over and neither of us knew how to get out of it. We had no counselor on site to wrench us from the hamster wheel of a mess.

When moms tell me that there is no way they could home school their child because they would butt heads, I just stand there thinking, "Been there done that."

But Robyn, the woman who at age sixteen knew who she was going to marry and wouldn't you know it, she did, was and is one amazing person. We had many wonderful conversations that astounded and inspired me! I loved watching her independence maneuver her education. She would read an author's complete works and then use the internet to further her studies by answering questions posed about the works?!! I do not have the attention span for that!

In eighth grade I hauled her off to a seminar. This is where she realized her education was her own. This is where ownership began. She, so responsible, always had a high school job and if the money was not decent she would request the amount desired and usually got it! When people would say to me what a good job I was doing with her, I would back out of the compliment as quick as I could. No, Robyn was the one, she was doing a good job.

This past March I was high up in the bleachers at West Chester University watching my little girl receive her degree in High School English Education. The honor of summa Cum laude was conferred on her. Robyn would tell you that she is glad she was home schooled. In fact the three older children are all appreciative. Just tonight, Kathryn said to me, "Mom, you always said that I would thank you for home schooling me, You are right! I am so glad for it."

Robyn, the first, was the hardest but what a privilege to be the mother of this young woman! Everything was worth it. We do not base our commitment to something for the ease of it, we commit to something because we know it to be what we are to do. However, honestly, if it were not for Lynn, I would not be committed to this endeavor. Glad he is around! He is the talker off the cliffer.

Theology in the Eyes of a Child

Jesse asks us a profound question as we are driving away from night church. We are silenced. Why God would ever entrust His creation to folks like us I will never understand.

"If we are to God like a speck of dust, how can He live in us?"

Good question!

"Jesse, we are almost to your grandparents house. Ask them!"

Grandpa told Jesse, God is a spirit and not restricted to size.

To see ourselves as a speck of dust is where we begin the extraordinary journey of glorifying God through the lives we live!

Weekends

What do you do? This was one full weekend! How are we to manage our day when we are exhausted from the weekend? Friday night was a celebration of the "win" at the Harvest parade. Eight boys, including my son, slept over night in the backyard. They had strict instructions to be in bed by midnight. That is almost like trying to get toothpaste back into the tube.

Saturday morning my daughters and I were off to an event called Queen for a Day. This event honors women who are caregivers twenty-four seven and find themselves with no time for themselves. This day is one in which they are prayed for and pampered.

In the evening there was a backyard twenty-first birthday party for the neighbor "boy." Geoff and I finished the night watching a movie. He was not fit for the Sunday morning message and I must be careful on Saturdays (hope I remember!). Nicole was sleeping over at someone's home.

Sunday after church we had Melissa, Chris and their two children, Stella and Eli over for homemade pizza with Antonio's dough! To die for! In the evening we hauled off to night church much to Nicole's dismay. She wanted to go trick-or-treating. She was adamant even after I read some decent pieces off of the internet sites on why it wasn't such a good idea. "Are you finished?" was her response.

Then we landed at my in-laws for our Sunday evening get together. These are treasured times with treasured in-laws. Nicole wanted to trick-or-treat in their development. I let her trick-or-treat at her grandparents house. She was satisfied as I answered the door with a voice to scare off any sane trick-or-treater. She's not sane! :)

So now the question is how are we to manage our day after a full weekend?
Do you let them rest? Do you wake them up and push and pull all morning? You would think I would have ready answers having done this a time or two!
Nope! I have none. What do you do?

Another " Should I Be Days"........

My track, like this track affected by an earthquake, needs a line up. Too many of these "Should I Be Days" in a row are fatal to my momentum. I am off course. Today was one of those days. I explained these funk kind of days before, just a few days ago.

I have not had a slew of these days because Lynn knows how to talk me off this cliff. But something went haywire today. Ah, now I know what it was! I was on Facebook at 5:15 a.m. looking at pictures of a young girl who is now in college. Her mother is an old friend. Early in the morning I was looking over somebody else's fence and wondering if my children were getting an adequate education. And all this just from looking at pictures, on facebook. How p-a-t-h-e-t-i-c is that? Say it, go ahead!

The Bible Study tonight I attended was on God's sovereignty. We are studying Daniel. This was the tonic I needed to kick me out of the slump. (sounds so dang spiritual, but the truth)

I am good to go for tomorrow. In fact I was so relieved after Bible study I decided it was time for a celebration. We headed over to Walmart and purchased the necessary fixings for nachos! I could eat a plate full of nachos with cheese, refried beans, etc. till I am blue in the face. Now it is 12:28 p.m., I am going to be exhausted. My day is full, I might be prone to more fence peeking because of being tired........

So, welcome to my world.

Grand Canyon, PA

Field Trips, can one ever do too many? Small children for over twenty-two years and now the youngest almost seven???

"She's out of the gate with a start, folks, heading down the tracks. Looks as if she has been couped up for a while, just look at her, that old mare just might win, ladies and gentlemen! Just look at her!"

Thursday morning, against conventional wisdom, we piled into a van and headed out to the Allegany Plateua region of PA, straight toward Potter County. The drive was breathtaking, for as much as I saw while awake. Dale the driver, thankfully was alert.

Our first stop was the Grand Canyon of Pa. As you can see on the picture, taken by Dawn, the other mother along, the Canyon is beautiful. A river winding its way through the hills on either side calls you down. Down is where we went zig zagging back and forth down the mountain. Up is where we had to return. That was a bit more of a challenge.

The following day we went to a Lumber museum and learned about the deforestation that took place and the conservation that developed after. Guess what I read more about? The American Chestnut Tree! I do not have time to write about it now but I will. When I start dreaming of American Chestnut saplings that is when I will start therapy.

We returned on Saturday. Short and sweet and to the point are my favorite trips!

Halloween, uh, I Mean Harvest Parade

As a little girl I grew up celebrating Halloween. My favorite costume was that of a nurse. I was five and knew that I could probably walk into a hospital and they would let me hook up an IV. I looked that good.

I love scary stories and I know how to scare the "bajupies" out of my children without even telling a scary story to the end. Truth be told, and do not tell them, I know not one scary story. It is all in the presentation.

Elverson has a parade. When our first three children were young it was called the "Halloween" parade. We can not go to that parade with a title such as that. These were our thoughts of long ago. We can not have hanging over our heads the thought of leading our children down the road to witchcraft, no way!

Many years ago Elverson renamed their parade, Harvest Parade. Here we go, that sounds a bit better to my sensitive conscience, we can go. Off we hike with Geoffrey, Nicky Sue and Jesse too. Love it! If they change it back to "Halloween Parade" we do not even care. We love this home town parade with two local High school bands, a local fife and drum, bagpipes, trucks, fire engines etc.

Tonight our son, on the sticks, along with very talented boys playing fiddles and a guitar won first place for a non business float. Our daughter and her friend and our youngest son threw out candy to the crowds. We sold coffee along the road in front of our friend's home.

This was a night to remember at the Hall...Harvest Parade. Too much fun!
Thanks to Terri Leamer for the photo, mom of two of the boys.

Field Trips

We listened to a woman talking to us about when and where she became passionate to save American Chestnut trees. We were on a field trip at Joanna Furnace. This day was a bit of history and science all in one. All eyes were on her as she is relaying to us their plight. The American Chestnut trees need help.

I force myself to pay attention, my mind wanders. I see an SNL skit in the making, something my children find amusing, "You always see everything as a potential SNL skit...????" I have to go to the back of the crowd, I fear I might break out laughing. To see so many interested in a tree amuses me. I can hardly be serious about myself let alone a tree.

Yet what she is telling us also intrigues me. God cares for not only the details but also the big picture. The details tend to bore me but I do recognize that if there were no details I would be totally bored. It is my pathetic lack of discipline to focus that leads me to boredom. I rely on the speaker to engage me instead of jump starting interest on my own.

Everything on this planet matters. The Creator created everything for a specific purpose and this particular woman telling us of the plight of the American Chestnut Tree gets it! I need more field trips to let it sink in!

I still think there's a good skit to be had!
(TACF Pollination Photos (June-July, 2008))

Yikes, The Day is Almost Gone!

A man has dropped out of heaven and has been coaching me with writing. He has also been pushing us with our businesses and encouraging us to stop creating more businesses but move forward with the ones we have.

"How many more children do you have to home school?" he asks with squinting eyes. My answer makes him flinch and groan. I smile, he just can not understand our lifestyle. Do I understand our lifestyle? He agrees that the family, our family is important but be also sees it necessary for me to be involved with our three businesses, I agree.

Many of my friends are off having fun in the afternoons either because their children are in school or in college. As well ,many of my friends are working to pay for their children's education.( I should add they are not all having fun all the time, they are doing their daily chores, I must be fair!) Lynn and I are smack dab in the throes of all this and raising a young family again.

Grace will see us through. God has not told us to stop homeschooling. In fact with our businesses it is a great learning tool and experience for these last three. They might actually see some exciting things happen. One never knows!

However, it is now noon, my meeting with this man lasted over two hours, two hours of just good stuff! What now, brown cow? First, I will take a breath. Secondly, I am writing. Thirdly, I will pull out my log book and see if I can pull something together for these turkeys.

While away a sculpture was created and pasted together and a horse corral was pulled together with living room furniture. So be it!

It is a good thing it is grace to grow the children, grace to grow our relationships, grace to grow the businesses! It all boils down to grace. What a relief it does not boil down to my abilities.

Guess I Have to Do It!

My husband three weeks ago complained that it seemed like it was going to default to him to start the stand, the coffee stand. I stared at him, eyes squinted at his eyes, hearing more than he was saying. Default to him? Where was he going with this? Was I suppose to feel sorry and raise my hand to rescue him from the default pit he was falling into? Those who know me know full well that mercy is something I always have to ask for!

We live along a busy road, we roast coffee, we sell coffee and for years he has wanted to sell coffee along our route. He even made a stand two years ago. We have used that stand, had to right that stand when the wind blew it over, tweaked that stand and have waited to use that stand.

Lynn knew the time was right and now he was bemoaning the fact. I was confused, I thought this was the awaited moment. I have been wrong before. Maybe it was looking more real, he could feel the pain of waking at 5:30 a.m., stumbling out to the studio to brew, and setting up the stand in the dark.

We have been selling our wares at a local Farmer's Market in Elverson, PA. The market was ending in October and people were wondering where now they could go for a cup of TwinValleyCoffee. We wondered too.

We came to the market like a dog being led to his crate when all he wants to do is play. Elverson has a newsletter and our names appeared in it with a request that people ask us to be apart of the Market. They wanted coffee. All we could think of was the commitment of every Saturday from 8:30 a.m. to 1:00 p.m. However, we were honored and realized that after all was said and done we would probably shudder at the thought of not doing it. Sometimes we are just plain dumb!

I wake up to a stellar cup of coffee everyday and how wonderful it was to share this with all the people we served at our stand. What a privilege to meet the residents of Elverson as well and serve them their Saturday morning cup of coffee. Surprisingly and really not so, it interrupted not a thing, we are just not that busy.

Now it was time and Lynn knew it. Time to pull that big old heavy clunker of a thing (don't tell him I said so)out to the side of the road and open up the Coffee Shack! And here he was complaining. Aye Vaye...what to do with this guy. We discussed this for a while and when we ended our discussion, let's just say, he was good to go.

I hauled off to Rhode Island to help my mother recuperate from an operation and Lynn stayed home and during that time opened up the Coffee Shack. The picture on this post is what he sent me via cell phone. I just smiled.

We are having fun. We both look forward to the wonderful people who stop and chat and purchase the best cup of coffee in town. We even let our friend Keith Grant stand there with his Dunkin Donuts stryofoam cup. Hey, you gotta start somewhere. We'll get him eventually. He likes the stryofoam, we like the paper........

Default, yea buddy, I guess it did default to you. You were the one with this coffee dream.

"Should I be?" Days.

These past couple of days need a name. Maybe they should be called "Should I be?" days. I have traveled this path before in the home school scheme of things. Yes, I accomplish learning experiences with the children. No, I am not losing my patience with them. But there is a looking over the fence on days like these, should I really be doing this. Everyone else is surely doing it "way much" better. I am convinced of it during these kinds of days. I go through the list of "shoulds." I should be reading this to them, I should be doing this with them, I should have them involved with this, with that, with EVERYTHING IN AND UNDER THE SUN!

I was talking with my father yesterday. Another couple from their apartment complex complimented his grandchildren,our children, the three birds we home school. They commented on their politeness and kindness. This was yet another compliment from our recent visit, a number of people had spoken to my parents along the same lines. This affirms our vision of true education which encompasses more than knowledge and ventures deep into the land of values.

"Should I be?" days are actually good for me to slog through. It never hurts to self-evaluate. I often come out the other end convinced that the course we are on is the course we are to be on. This world is shifting, knowledge is increasing at such a rapid rate we have to be wise and prudent as to what we believe is to be the knowledge base for this period of time.

But this I know to be true, even during my "Should I be?" days, the Word of God stands true and unchanged by the changing times. Though the knowledge base is changing like the speed of lightning, God is not. The daily practice of Bible reading with the freedom to discuss what comes up during the reading is something that should pull me quickly out of the "Should I be?" days!

The Tree Climber

One never knows what the day will hold but we do know who holds the day! Sunday was one of those days I was truly glad to know The Day Holder as my six year old tree climber fell twenty feet from the top of his grandparent's tree. I was transporting Nicole to night church at Community Evangelical Free Church and upon returning was met with the grim news.

Jesse was obviously struggling to breathe, his neck and back hurt, and when touching his tummy it was obvious there was pain. My brother in law, a physical therapist, witnessed the fall. He was able to give him the medical treatment necessary and helped me to process the fact that an ambulance ride was in order!

The ambulance took us to Reading Hospital's trauma center and there we were met by a team of doctors. The medical community is amazing to me at at time of crisis. Lynn and I waited in a room. Lynn had been coming back from a Phillies game with our son, Geoffrey. They were celebrating Geoff's thirteenth birthday. This was a day of events that our family was having a hard time keeping up with and now this.

The trauma doctor told us that they were going to keep him for observation, hold off on a Cat Scan in lieu of the fact that his body is so little for such a high dose of radiation, and determine through blood work if there was internal bleeding. Jesse and I spent the night in the same bed.

Yesterday around three o'clock they told us that due to the fact that his vitals were good, the blood work was not revealing internal bleeding and that he was able to handle his meal, Jesse could go home.

We walked out of the hospital around four thirty sporting a hospital gown due to the fact his shirt had been ripped off him by the trauma team, dirty socks (but not like Saturday!), and hair that looked like it was on the verge of dreadlocks.

Thank you God for sparing Jesse from broken bones, paralyzation, head injury, and internal damage. God holds the day and He holds the little boy falling from a tree.

Jesse learned a lot. He was awed by what he described as "his dark red blood." Learning happens!

Children Are Amazing!

Yes, I home school. Yes, I believe in home schooling. Do I think it is the only way? No! This is why, we live in a world where diversity exists. Diversity in a forest is a protection against an entire forest being wiped out by a disease that only one type of tree is susceptible to. Diversity allows us to broaden and go deep. Why do we always want to be on the same page? Can you imagine a book of just one page, how boring.

Here is a great example of a public school system motivating their students to create poetry that makes you see. I have to share this, I have done so without permission. Let them yell! I do not care. This is one fantastic poem written by a twelve year old young man, Francis Nyssen. He is the son of dear friends of ours, Greg and Rachel Nyssen, living in Seattle, Washington. He wrote this poem for a writers program in his school. It is amazing. I see it, hear it, smell it, and feel it. Children are amazing.

This is what Rachel wrote on her blog:

"last night, we were at the seattle art museum for the book launch party of
-YOU WILL NOT COME BACK UNCHANGED-a book of poetry and prose from seattle area students K-12, thru the writers in the schools program. francis had one of his poems selected for this book, and he was to read it at the event. we were so proud i actually teared up when i first found out."
http://rachelnyssen.blogspot.com

Enjoy!


ODE TO BIRDS: (by francis nyssen)

Birds, birds
are the most
colorful animals
green
brown
yellow
red
blue
turquoise
purple
neon blue--
I could go on.
The king of nests
has a fancy for huge
very decorated nests.
It's turquoise
and neon blue. It
sends you in a trance.
A yellow canary goes
black against the sun
on a sunny
day.
A rattle of leaves and sounds tell
you
the toucan hops
from branch to
branch, chirping.
It's beak shining, making
us see a blur of color.
A crow searches
endlessly for its
old feathers
of white.
The mimicker of
sounds mimics
the sound of its falling
forest. The king
of voice shines
its colorful feathers.
Red, blue
yellow, green,
it has a stubby
beak. It makes
you see a sea of
colors. Making
you smell fruit.
Cloves send a scent to me
making me think of birds.
A fresh
drink of chai
reminds me of when
I'm sitting in
the bird dome at
the zoo.
At night I can imagine
a vulture looks despairingly
jealous of all the color.
Starlings are
considered
good luck when
they live in your house.
A bird's color is what
the vulture
wants so badly.
Cardinal's red
makes it
look like a
streaking flame
of light across
the sky,
making fire
burn in your
eyes.

by Francis Nyssen

Reflection: Ethiopia

On route to Rhode Island I called Lynn.

"You have to send me Ethiopia coffee, ground, for the ride back!"

This coffee is better than any power drink, better than an IV caffeine hookup, better than, than, it is just the best. My golly, I get to Rhode Island, why stop there, I am ready to go all the way to the border of Canada.

When Lynn is the driver I hop in the car and immediately go to sleep. It is a bit disconcerting when I know that I am the sole driver. Ethiopia coffee, no worries for me, I am safe and awake.

The Flexibility

This morning, as soon as I can, I and the three younger children will be off to Rhode Island. My mother is having surgery, hernia repair. We will be there to help her.....!!!????

We will have fun, yet, it is sad. We like it when we are all together, and we leave four people behind. There is enough bickering in the car when we are all together that would make you think otherwise but it is all a part of being with a family. If there was no bickering there would be no familiarity, can not have one without the other.

If a car is available, the flexibility that home school offers is vundaba. To just go sit at the Atlantic Coast is an awesome thing..........hope to do that. To maybe take in some free historic offerings....want to do that too! To listen to tunes with the children, windows down, chatting about frivolous stuff or discussing issues is a treat I enjoy while driving.

I do not take a working vehicle for granted. I do not take the availability of gas for granted. I do not take "only a hernia repair" operation for granted. I do not take these three engaging children for granted. I will miss the rest of the Burkholder Clan! We are off.

Coffee, I Would Have Never Guessed.

On Wednesdays I am selling coffee by the cup, Twin Valley Coffee mugs, coffee beans by the bag, coffee hand bags, and giving out coffee samples. I am alone at my coffee stand, I am outside in the fresh air, I am yacking with people of all kinds as well as the regulars who grace the place and all is well with the world. I am a vendor at the Reading Hospital Farmer's Market.

Never would I have guessed this for me. I had always been a social coffee drinker and a minimal one at that, until, he ruined me. Every morning smelling freshly brewed coffee wafting through the hallways from the kitchen lured me into the habit. Not only was his coffee freshly brewed but it was freshly roasted. Therein lies the difference between the coffee you are buying at Dunkin Donuts and Twin Valley Coffee. The coffee from Dunkin Donuts is probably not fresh, the beans most likely were ground days ago and it was probably not roasted yesterday. Do not quote me on this, I could be wrong, but I think I am right .

To freshly roasted, freshly brewed coffee, I am now addicted. And I am also a dealer luring others into an addiction. In November I will be sharing how we started our coffee company with a group of women. In January I will be again sharing with another group. The funny thing about that, for so long this coffee stuff just irritated me! It was a rabbit trail. Look who is hopping now.

Word to the wise, let your husband dream and follow him.

Horse Out of the Gate? It Should Be That Way But....

Every morning I wake up with a fresh determination to get right at it and read my bible so I can educate these birds, of course after I walk. I walk at 6:00 a.m. and though I start out looking like a drunken sailor I come home invigorated. I always intend to crack open the Bible. But.......as soon as I walk into the kitchen there it is, the COMPUTER, the window to the world, the connection to everyone.

I slip into the chair and I check my email, I go to Drudge Report and catch up on the latest bad news, I start working on this blog, I recheck my email...
I am so easily distracted. I am writing this at 5:57 a.m., how much do you want to bet that today will be different? Different because now I will feel really guilty.

What amazes me is how easy it is for me to forget what I have learned in the past! The days when I start out, after my walk, meditating on the Bible and talking with the God of the universe are days with a sense of continuity, consistency, and order. These days help me to "get right to it." They are also days where I experience Joy.

What is my problem?

It is now 7:55 a.m. Guess what I did not do? I am going right now......really, I am.
Tommorrow will be different.

Monday Morning

Monday is here. This is the day that breaks or makes me. This is the day that sets my feet in the right direction. Monday morning is significant to all the other days. At least that is always the way I have viewed a Monday morning. However, in light of my faith, should it not be Sunday that determines my week? Have I misplaced the priority?

I have heard it said that Sunday should not be a day that prepares us for the others. But rather we should prepare ourselves for Sunday, the day of rest. Or whatever day you choose as the day of rest. If Sunday would be that kind of day do you think Monday would be different?

Maybe I should look to Sunday as a day to work towards, a day to rest, to settle my soul. A day to look to the Source, ground my spirit in the Book. If I treated Sunday as the hollowed day that it is would I come dragging to Monday with a meandering, not ready to face the work, spirit?

Who knows?

Reflection: Just Keep Talking

My husband and I over the years have learned an important lesson.
When it seems your child is uninterested,
keep talking.
When they look at you as if you really do have five heads,
keep talking.
When their body language loudly asks you to shut up,
keep talking.

Three of our children are now past high school. They will confirm this. They will tell you that though many times they were looking for us to stop talking,
they were glad we kept talking.
We have three younger ones and
we know we can not stop talking.

Our children's attitudes have never been our gauge to determine whether we should talk or not.
The gauge we use is their need.
This is a no brainer, this is why we
keep talking.
Children are so needy.

Dori in "Nemo," says it best. Just keep swimming. Just switch out talking for swimming.

The Limiting Factor

The problem with home schooling is me. I am the limiting factor. I assign work but sometimes fail to check on the assigned work. I make unrealistic requests or set unrealistic goals. I fall asleep reading to them only to find when I wake up they are not waiting for me to finish the sentence. I am distracted, easily persuaded to watch something like Steve Jobs talk about the latest......... Sometimes I do not feel like finishing what we started or I actually forget what I started.

The problem with home schooling is me. I firmly tell an offender to go to their room and only when they call out forty-five minutes later do I remember that I sent them to their room. I do not finish a curriculum that is working because I do not use it for a week and do not know where I last put it. Home schooling requires me to be "on my game." Frankly, I do not enjoy being "with it" twelve hours of the day.

My goal in life is to sit. I am not a dooer. I try to accomplish things and what gets in the way is my insatiable need to sit and read, contemplate or stare. I really like to do that. Home schooling requires a bit more from me than sitting. The sky is the limit with home schooling it really is. Unfortunately my energy level is the limiting factor as well.

Three in the Morning Too Early!

Why did I wake up at three o'clock in the morning when I really need my sleep to accomplish all that lies before me? Who knows. I just know to get up and not turn over! I stumble downstairs and find my bible and stare. My mind is cluttered with condemnation. "You should do this, you should do that, why aren't you doing this, what provoked you to do that, when do you think you will finish this, how are you going to pay for that, when will you write all the thank you notes, what are you going to do about that?"

Hounded!I ain't nothing but a hounded dog. I was talking with a dear woman yesterday about schooling choices. She has decided to send her three school age children to school. The first morning was not so good. When you have prayerfully considered what you are to do and you believe you are walking in obedience, it just stinks when it turns out that way. Standing firm in what we are doing seems to be harder than standing on a boulder near the Maine shore with twenty feet waves crashing onto it grabbing at anything to bring back to the ocean! Honestly!

It hit me while talking to her. Those of us who have home school hearts will always be plagued with intense insecurity and doubts, this is just what I/we have to accept. I remember being a Resident Assistant in college and struggling with the same doubts; am I doing enough for my hall, should I be doing more. My boss encouraged me that this was a sign of my dedication, my caring about the job.

Everyone of us who have children in school or educating them at home should have a "home school heart" which I believe simply put is; caring that their children are receiving what they need by way of knowledge and character development(and certainly not in that order).I will never believe that the choice of our option to educate determines our heart. Parents with children in public or private can have a home school heart like the home schooler. Public, private, or home school are all great choices. What is not so great is when we as parents do not cultivate a home school heart. My friend is hounded and her children are in school, I am hounded and my children are home. We agreed we are forced to prayer! Not a bad thing.

To further this point, the educational option we choose does not determine our heart. There are thousands of parents with a home school heart who send their children to school. Likewise there are many home school parents without a home school heart who should probably be educating their children with a different mode. We can not see the heart! We need to remember this.


So I concluded yesterday, that it is alright if I wake up many mornings at three o'clock filled with a myriad of complicated, insecure thoughts. It just shows that I care and need desperately to bring it all to Jesus! If this is what Jesus has to do to get me to talk to him, it's all good! It's all good! I ain't nothing but a hounded dog!

A Long Time

When Robyn was three months old we attended our first home school conference at Elizabethtown. Many of the speakers have probably put their teaching tools to rest and have moved on into their different phases of life. Our three oldest are done, this year would have been the year for us. But instead as God saw fit we have three more, one still needing to learn to read.

My tools are still in use. Today will be another new year for a group that was started when Robyn was in kindergarten. Helen Hertzler had at least seven students that she met with once a week and while reading the "Trumpet of the Swan" she led them in the most creative unit studies. To be an educator such as Helen would be an honor.

This group has grown into over fifty families that meets for twenty weeks out of the year. Not only do we have an elementary program but we offer high school classes as well. Ten years ago we started a drama program that is still in existence with some changes. The Learning Group, Community Home School Learning Group (for lack of a better title, we lack in creativity!), has provided activities that would be available if one were in school.

Community Home Schoolers has experienced years of God's grace and mercy! Our three youngest are excited for today, the start of another year at the learning group. Their bags are packed, snacks ready to go. A group like this offers a one day shot for homeschoolers to enjoy group learning. There are many things that a child can not experience minus the context of a group.

The discipline problems are solved with family members involved and apologies offered. For the years we have rolled it is amazing the lack of drama. This group is laid back. I am thankful for that.

However, these last couple of weeks have been spent conferring and organizing the details it takes for a group to run. We lost our favored Phys Ed teacher and had to go looking for a replacement. God was good to us again by providing us with another college qualified PE teacher. This new woman has been teaching up at the high school and has implemented programs there that are still in existence, now we are privileged to have her.

So begins another year. Geoffrey in the eighth, Nicole in the fourth, and Jesse in the first! this is amazing.

Relax?! Sure.........

The day is not over.
There's more to be done.
What's left is not minimal.
It seems like a ton.

To bed I can shoo them.
To bed they must go.
I can send them in a hurry,
Or change pace and go slow.

Tomorrow is coming.
Tomorrow waits not.
Adulthood follows quickly
then a big empty slot.

They love me to read.
To snuggle's a must.
The ton will wait patiently.
and now I must trust.

God's timing is infinite.
My timing is not.
He says "Just relax.
You are in the right spot."

By Lynne T. Burkholder
Today,out of control. Whose control? Mine.

Movie Scene: Wholesome Flicks!

Picture credit: An arranged marriage, NOT. This marriage will not be a statistic,it will last! Cyndi and Geoff Treichler married at BOMA, Columbus Ohio on August 27, 2010.

Last night we watched two films. "A Man Called Peter" which was excellent and "Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi" a foreign film. We did not know that this was a foreign film initially, Geoffrey was not happy but it did not take long for this movie to reel us in, man, what fun! I recommend both films. You leave them with a sense of wholeness and actually being challenged by the themes presented.

"Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi" is a film of an arranged marriage and the challenges an arrangement provides along with the beauty as well. It is an Indian musical. I am often bored by musicals but these interludes of music and dancing are just plain fun and goofy. A movie that makes me laugh out loud is rare, this one did.

Judy (Wetmore) Logan has probably seen this movie, but if she has not, I know she will love it. Judy is a friend from college and if you are looking for an engaging book or a great movie this is the woman who has the lists. If Judy likes it, it is good. Funny thing about Judy, I never see her, I have no idea what her latest movies or books are that she would suggest. After all these years she still remains my standard. It has always been a pity that I like Judy more than she likes me.

"Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi" comes close to the solid truth yet diverges on the subject of Hinduism. The references to God are prolific but with a small "g" in all the subtitles. The wisdom from this flick is age old and much to glean from but the "god in you" theme is prevalent throughout the film. This is the biggest drawback. At age fortyish close to fiftyish I can overlook it while reaping the good.

To choose to fall in love, we do not see that kind of courage in our society. We have to feeeeeeeel first, then we choose. The Indian culture still continues in arranged marriages. Interestingly enough the divorce rate pales compared to our "fall in love" society. This movie will give you something to think about and will challenge your paradigms.

"A man Called Peter" diverges not from a Judeo-Christian theme. Peter Marshall was a minister back in the mid fifties that understood the need to be relevant without watering down the gospel. The movie contained long segments of Peter giving sermons. Surprisingly enough they held all of our attention. This is a must see as well.

Reflection: One Never Knows

Picture Credit: Robyn and RJ Saunders married August 15, 2009.

Robyn our oldest and now married to her man, when in high school, attended a journalism camp at Penn State's main campus. Journalism/photography was something she thought she might enjoy. When we picked her up at the end of the time her response was typical Robyn, "It was o.k..." You are waiting for more, driven to madness waiting for more, and that is probably all you are going to get, get over it.

She has never been our drama queen. She is the straight shooter and whether you want the truth or not, you are going to get the truth. If she is unhappy about something there is nothing in her that has a need to sugar coat it, or hide it. You never have to guess. I have appreciated this aspect of her over the years and have equally been challenged by it as well.

She did learn at the camp, that was "ok" four hundred dollars later "ok", that if she was to pursue photography it would be separate from journalism. She felt the photography you learn to support the journalism endeavor would be just that, supportive photography lessons. She wanted more. I thought this was insightful.

This spring she graduated from West Chester with a High School English teaching certificate. She actually completed everything in August but they let her walk in May. The job market is abysmal. This is unfortunate for some students out there because they might never have Robyn as their teacher.

Robyn's student teaching experience was great. She taught at Darby Middle School, bad section, and was able to maintain good classroom control. You always want to do what Robyn says, she just has an authority about her. I noted this at an early age...
However, with twelve resumes swirling around and no one biting she has realized it is just not meant to be, at least for this year.

This past week Robyn was hired by a newspaper to sell advertising. She might possibly be writing for the food section as well. The four hundred dollar investment for the journalism at Penn State..........you never know!

Phone Calls; Answer or Not?

Picture Credit: Vera Martin's bouquets on reception tables at Robyn and RJ's outdoor wedding reception in our backyard.

We no longer have an answering machine, I hate them, so when the phone rings it is a one shot deal. I really do feel bad if I do not answer. However, when I am in the middle of prime teaching I often just let it ring. My children do not. Today I was blessed they answered.

On the other line was a woman, earlier in the summer, I had been encouraged to call to offer encouragement. Her son, when tested, did not meet the standards that a first grader is expected to meet. He had been at our home school learning group last year and she was putting him in school this year. The woman in charge of the elementary section of our group thought I should give her a ring. "No, I do not do that, she is free to do what she wants." Period.

One morning it was as if I HAD to call her and reassure her that her son was on track for "his" track. We had a great talk. Regardless of their schooling choice I just wanted her to know that she need not worry about test scores! Period. She knows her child better than anyone, even the teacher. Mother's intuition is to be trusted, just relax I told her.

She called this morning. She said she knew I would "get it." Her father died un-expectantly of a heart attack in July, shortly after her and I had talked. After his death there were many things that became apparent. One of them was an understanding of why she home schooled her son last year. Had she not he would not have had the opportunity to spend time with his granddad. She had been so sick and regretted the time wasted on her son's education but now in retrospect saw the beauty of her son's time with his grandparents because of her sickness. It was all making sense even though the loss is profound. She wanted me to know this.

Her son has transitioned well into brick and mortar school. His teacher is a christian who is watching that his little broken heart is cared for. What a relief to his mom. God is good.

We talked of the plans that we have and she said, "But God trumps them all!" Why are we home schooling? We might discover it has nothing to do with what we thought. It just might be for a little boy to spend more time with his grandfather. Will that be revealed on test scores? Not on certain test scores, but the test that matters, you bet ya.

I need to make sure I do not implement hard and fast rules such as not answering the phone during teaching times. I need to be led. Talking with this woman felt as if I had called 1-800-testimony!

The More They Have The More They Want...

Picture Credit: A Highlight for a number of families who have made this a yearly tradition is camping at Poe Paddy. Tubing down the river regardless of the water level is a must. The vacation that we as families spend at Poe Paddy proves less is more and more is less. There are little to no conveniences at Poe Paddy but much more of everything else!

My children will wake up this morning and there will be me to look forward to, seems a bit boring. We will manage to eat breakfast and not necessarily all together. We will then proceed to do our work and that too might look unorganized, but we will do it.
Lunch will quickly approach, sooner in their thoughts than in mine, and we will figure something out to eat. Then we will wind down and the afternoon will be here. What amazes me is that many times they are not bolting at that point. They are content to be with me still.

Over the years I have discovered this piece of information that is only discovered when it happens; the more my children have of me or my husband the more they want of me or my husband. Last year when I clicked off to work at eleven fifteen in the morning they likewise clicked me out of their picture. After working for a couple of months my return home was insignificant, they would not meet me at the door I would have to find them. Of course they would hug or kiss me then but they were following suit.

When I discontinued work they likewise discontinued their nonchalance attitude of my presence, they again wanted to be with me more. This insight into their behavior is so fascinating to me. Yesterday I thought about it again as all three of us were off to purchase cake decorating supplies (minimal decorating supplies, not the real stuff). They are watching "Cake Boss" and convinced this is their destiny. Today we are making fondant. I am sure I have the spelling wrong and my pronunciation of it is continually being corrected. As we are in the store at five o'clock this is what I am thinking, "Why are they so excited about this? Why are they so happy to still be with me?"

Children do not bore of their parents, though society would have you think that. Children love to be with us. The more they have of us the more they want and their ability to adjust to our presence or desire our presence is telling.

Behind the Power Curve

It is nine o'clock on my computer and they are still sleeping. They persuaded me to watch a documentary last night. I chose it. It was on Egyptians'sailing ability rarely highlighted in history books. As I do with most movies/documentaries I slept. When I woke up I suggested we finish it in the morning. They informed me it had just finished. Alright then, how was it? They loved it.

So today they are still sleeping and I just pray no one comes to the door. At least the unfriendly homeschooling sorts. Yesterday I was selling coffee at a local Farmer's Market and Nicole came with me. She told me this was in place of her school. She wondered why I had brought work for her? It just looks good.

Geoffrey stayed home with Jesse and a list of assignments. When I looked over his assignments, uncompleted, he began his reasoning. Yadayadayada! But mom I thought you told me to just read. No Geoff I told you to complete the questions going back into the text for the answer. This is the angst, and if this is the angst, I think I can live with it. I love being with Geoffrey, he is one pleasure, his smile!

So, I have to wake them up and then decide what to do next. Should have thought of that last night, but I was freezing corn. Really wish I could feed them breakfast pills so we could move on with the day. I need good breakfast suggestions!

Constant Activitiy

Picture Credit: Robyn (Burkholder) Saunders posing for her sister Kathryn at Geoff and Cyndi Treichler's wedding in Columbus, Ohio. Robyn is excellent at posing in an interpretive sort of way....

Do my children have too much down time? I am living on a busy street with cars zooming past my kitchen window. The school buses go by every morning and every afternoon. Am I aiding or detracting from my children's childhood by keeping them home? Some would answer it one way and others another.

The culture I am surrounded by is one in which everyone is busy. We are not.
The uneasiness of not being busy enough, of possibly missing something crucial, would it be calmed by jumping into the rushing current the culture is flowing in? Do I need to get my children more involved and if so, in what? I am hounded, hounded I tell you.

The older I become, the longer I have home-schooled the steadier my feet are in the rushing current, however, it is still a current to contend with, still a current that hounds me. Oh, to be unaffected completely that would be marvelous but that is probably something that will not happen while I am still breathing.

The thinkers of the past, what the heck did they do with their time? Descartes spent most of the morning and afternoon in bed initially on account of a weak constitution but then it became his way of studying. He developed the coordinate system as a way of locating a fly on a wall as he was prone in bed. Newton contemplated gravity, contemplated, he took the time to think.

My family is in a society of doers and this is fostered pretty early in life. We are doers in a different way. We do not fill our time with sports and an assortment of outside activities but rather creative outlets. How all of this will be used only God knows. Lynn and I know one thing, we can not live any other way even if we are hounded and tempted to jump into the current rushing in the opposite direction past us!

One Big Obstacle Course!

Picture Credit: Geoffrey Burkholder in one of his contemplative moments, ya gotta be quick with the camera for these moments.

Geoff calls me yesterday while I was at the grocery store. Geoff always calls me with something. He is the boy who wakes up in the morning ready to do whatever we are not doing. He is the boy who is known by many that I might never meet. He is the horse at the gate ready to bolt. Yet he is my guy who will spend half the night talking of deep and contemplative subjects. What a packed kid.

His friend, Evan, calls him after school to tell Geoff that he was in every one of Evan's classes. Great! Here we go. I placed the affadavit (that piece of paper given to a school district stating your intent of homeschooling)in the portfolios. The school district obviously did not see the paper. This is not a problem except that now Geoff thinks he should just go this year and see what it is like. Obstacle.

The processing we had accomplished a couple of weeks ago when I had made an appointment to see the guidance counselor at the Middle school was fading. A couple of days before I planned to see the counselor Geoff decides he would rather stay home this year. He was realizing what he will be missing if he went to school. Now this obstacle is placed right in our path on the first day of homeschooling.

Yesterday it was close. Why not just send him? What is the big deal? These thoughts float in my mind innocuously, innocently not thinking of what has led us to our decision to home school....believing that God led us to this decision.

Staying on course with homeschooling has probably been one of the most challenging things I have yet to do! These obstacles are not something I step over lightly or process carelessly. What if this is meant to be? Am I keeping Geoff from significant opportunities? My mind hurts thinking of all of this! What if, what if, what if? I have said it and I will say it again; swimming upstream against the culture is really hard. Why can't Lynn and I just live like the rest?

God has led us to home school and for now this is what we are to do, I think...........I know, I hope, I pray. Would you pray for me?

To Lead or Be Led? This is the Question.

Picture Credit: Jesse Burkholder, an industrious and busy guy. Can you trust him to clean your car? Does Bob Treichler own a vacumm? That should tell ya!



"Chris, you can fit everything into your Chevette and what you can not fit, come back for it next weekend." With that sentence I retrieved sanity into our first day of home schooling for the 2010-2011 year. Chris agreed and it meant he could leave whenever he wanted, we were all happy.

Last night as I was saying goodnight to Jesse he adamantly requested that tomorrow he be signed up for school, "seriously, mom!" What about when he is seven, can he then? Eight? Nine? Ten? Thirty? Absolutely, thirty sounds great. There are days when I wonder what provokes me to home school, a masochistic sense about me?

Nicole came into my bedroom with a clipboard in tow, I am in bed she is obviously not. "Mom, tomorrow I need for you to wake me up before the boys. Do whatever you need to do, shake me, whatever. I want to be finished early. I want to start with math, then science, then reading, then history."

It is hard to doze off with the fourth grader drill Sargent barking out my orders. Does she realize I am not prepared for anything. But I think she is on to something, she is taking charge of her education, pushing me to push her. I am being led. The question is this? Will I allow my children to lead or will I take up the reigns and make them follow me? What is education all about? At the end of my bed I am witnessing the beauty of homeschooling. Oh, God, please let me follow.

I am not really worried about what I am teaching these children,I am convinced I can give out Master Degrees with all the curriculum I have accumulated over the years of homeschooling.This morning I pulled off the shelves curriculum that looked fitting. Curriculum is never wasted! Even if you sell it at your garage sale, someone like me is buying it and using it somewhere along the line.

I love Latin and every year I try to do something with it! I was never good at Latin in all three years of it at Barrington Highschool. The Ivy league bound kids sitting next to me were,but still I loved it. I am determined with these last three to instill a love for it in them. Geoffrey today translating sentences looks up at me and says, "Why are we studying a language that is never spoken?" This is the age old question that plagues many Latin students.

Thank you for the question, Geoff. Latin derivatives in our English language are a dime a dozen! If you know Latin you are able to define words you had never seen before, besides which it is quite easy to learn........I'm sure.

Let us hope that this year will be a year in which I see the beauty of being led. I am also hoping that this is the year I actually keep my cool. Oh, let's hope!